So happy together

"Whether you've been married for 38 years, 8 years or are a newlywed, you've probably picked up a few of the keys to a happy marriage, one which is nurturing and continues to grow. Maybe your marriage has struggled, but you've found a road back to each other and have insights for those in similar situations. What would you say are the three most key elements in your marriage that keep the romance alive and the heart aflutter? "

Our wedding announcement photo

Joseph and I have been married for 12 1/2 years now. Because we believe marriage is eternal we were married in the Salt Lake Temple. We each covenanted with God that we'd stay true to each other. It's rather surreal how it seems like just yesterday we were married, and at the same time, it seems like we've been married for ages. I truly feel we have the 'ideal' relationship. I don't know of any other couple that gets along as well as we do. We truly are made for each other, which is a rather strange thing to say because we are so different in many ways. However, we are alike in many more ways. It's hard to narrow down the things we do to keep our marriage happy and healthy but here goes.

#1 We unselfishly serve each other. Marriage isn't 50/50. It's 100/100. We try our best to make sure the other is comfortable, happy, and cared for. After a long day of work Joseph deserves to come home to a clean house, a good meal, happy children, and a loving (not nagging) wife. Joseph, in turn, works hard to provide for my needs and my wants. We've been blessed with very little problems or disagreements throughout our marriage. When one does creep up it's usually because of selfishness. We've come to recognize that and are quick to fix it.

Along with making sure our physical needs are met, we try to also make sure emotional needs are met. We compliment each other. When I'm told "You look beautiful today" it sends my heart soaring.

#2 Pray together. Nothing compares to the sweet spirit that comes when you petition the Lord as a couple for the welfare of your family.

#3 Small talk and love notes. We both look forward to the end of each day when the kids have all been sent to bed, usually by 9pm. The house is quiet and it's just us. In the winter time we sip hot chocolate, in the summer we drink chocolate milkshakes and just talk - about our days, our goals, the children, the gospel. This is our time. On the days when we know we won't be able to talk - like during the haying season - we leave love notes for the other to find. I'll slip one in his boot where he'll find it in the morning or he'll snap a picture of himself holding a sign that says "I love you, Shorty" that I'll see when I upload pictures onto the computer. The notes aren't fancy just short, sweet and to the point. They are little reminders that we are thinking of one another.

So there you go. No fancy words of advice. Just simple acts we do for our marriage. They work for us. After 12 years of marriage, Joseph still melts my heart.